Les Poissons

"Les Poissons" is a song from the film The Little Mermaid. The song is sung the comical chef, Chef Louis. It is a short comic relief song and ends with a classic chase scene between Louis and Sebastian.

Lyrics
Les poissons, les poissons How I love les poissons Love to chop and to serve little fish

First I cut off their heads Then I pull out their bones Ah mais oui, ça c'est toujours délice

Les poissons, les poissons Hee hee hee, haw haw haw With a cleaver I hack them in two I pull out what's inside And I serve it up fried 'Cuz I love little fishes, don't you?

Here's something for tempting the palate Prepared in the classic technique First you pound the fish flat with a mallet Then you slash off their skin' Give their belly a slice Then you rub some salt in  'Cause it makes it taste nice

Zut alors, I have missed one!

Sacrebleu, what is this? How on earth could I miss Such a sweet little succulent crab Quel Dommage, what a loss Here we go, in the sauce Now some flour I think just a dab. Now I stuff you with bread. It don't hurt, 'cause you're dead! And you're certainly lucky you are  'Cause it's gonna be hot in my big silver pot! Tout-aloo mon poisson Au revoir

Original Lyrics
In a demo sung by Howard Ashman, the scene of Les Poissons has changed from Chef Louis cooking crab for Prince Eric's dinner to him teaching a class of chefs. Little about the song has changed except for the part where he finds Sebastian.

Ah, ze crab!

I'll give you a demonstration, of my special preparation!

First you nad ze crab! Zen you grab ze crab! Zen you STAB ze crab!

From there on out, it's nothing but instrumentals, suggesting Sebastian escaped and sent the entire kitchen into disarray.

Comic Adaptation Lyrics
The comic adapated the song with a new set of lyrics, removing the main phrase of Les Poissons with, Petit Fish. Petit Fish (3x)

Set zem out on a dish, Rip zair skin with a knife, chop zair- huh?

At this point Chef Louis finds Sebastian and starts singing a new

C'est si bon! Zis is nice! In ze sauce wiz ze spice!

Reprise
The Broadway musical version of the show features a reprise, again sung by Chef Louis and his chef assistants as they present the dinner party with their meal, frightening Ariel with all the dead fish, until the party is crashed by Sebastian breaking out of Louis copper pot, sending the dinner party into turmoil.

LOUIS ''And now something truly exquisite The creme of the creme de la creme! Ho, ho, ho you may ask, but what is it? It's a teensy suprise A delectable treat One i'm sure you'll just love Allez, bon appetit!''

CHEFS ''Les Poissons, Les Poissons! Ooh la, la! Here they are! Say bonjour to our friends from the sea!'' CHEF 1 Fish fillet! CHEF 2 Fish pate! CHEF 3 Fish flambe! CHEF 4 Fish tartare! LOUIS It's a fish-how you say?-jamboree! CHEF 5 Curried bass!

CHEF 6 Kippered smelt!

CHEF 7 Fish-ka-bobs!

CHEF 8 Tuna melt!

LOUIS If it's grilled, its been grilled to a "t"!

CHEFS Fish lightly toasted and roasted and steamed! Tossed in the blender and tenderly creamed Dish after dish like you'd wish to have dreamed!

LOUIS'' And now for the grand finale La piece de resistance A delicayly, by golly You won't find in the resturants! A tidbit to tease your tastebuds With that certain je ne sais quois Voila!''

Trivia

 * "Les poissons" means "the fish(es)" in French and is plural for "le poisson".
 * Les poissons is sung in the same tune as Be Our Guest from Beauty and the Beast, a song also sung by a French character, Lumiere.