Professional Diagnosticians

Professional Diagnosticians is a song in Adventures in Wonderland, in the episode For Better or Verse sung by the Mad Hatter and the March Hare while they find out why the White Rabbit is ryhming alot.

The March Hare: It might be something simple like nutrition.

The Mad Hatter: If that is the case, then tea and crumpets will cure the affliction.

The Mad Hatter and the March Hare: If you want to know what’s the matter, call Hare and the Hatter. If we can’t tell you what’s wrong, then nobody can. To determine the condition of your condition maybe we should mention that we both without exception are among the finest professional diagnosticians.

The March Hare: It maybe some strange and rare malady.

The Mad Hatter: To make a bold analogy, I’d say you had an allergy.

The Mad Hatter and the March Hare: We’re the best anywhere, call the Hatter and the Hare. If we can’t tell you what’s wrong, then nobody can. To determine the condition of your condition maybe we should mention that we both without exception are among the finest professional diagnosticians.