Satisfaction Guaranteed

"Satisfaction Guaranteed" is a song from Geppetto. It is sung by Professor Buonragazzo, his son, and the "perfect son" that they create.

Lyrics
Girl 1: I'll be papa's little princess, I'll be mama's little pal. For I love you both to pieces. What you say to do, I shall.

I love cooking, I love sewing, Dusting when I get the chance, But like every little blonde girl, What I do the best is dance.

Professor Buonragazzo: Satisfaction guaranteed, satisfaction guaranteed. See Professor Buonragazzo For the better way to bleed. Buy an artificial child and you're certain to succeed As a parent Guaranteed.

Boy 1: Can I be your little sonny, Hug your leg and call you "pop"? Can I be exactly like you, And play catch until you drop?

Substitute Pinocchio: Could I be your new Pinocchio? See? I look a little wooden. But I'll never disobey you. You're my papa, so, I could'un.

Group: Satisfaction guaranteed. Have a child who pays you heed. From a smart-mouthed kid with individuality you're freed.

Professor Buonragazzo: (?) him any fool opinion, Teach him any crackpot creed.

Mothers & Buonragazzo: (?) guaranteed.

Professor Buonragazzo: Why be settled with a daughter who's a whiner? Must you suffer with a son who's a brat?

Group: No!

Group & Professor Buonragazzo: Bring him back for an adjustment. It's quite minor.

Professor Buonragazzo: Turn the dial. Wait a while. Zap, and that is that.

Group: Zap, and that is that.

Professor Buonragazzo & Citizen: Satisfaction guaranteed, satisfaction guaranteed.

Citizens: If you purchase perfect prodigy

Professor Buonragazzo: And each one pedigree.

Boy 2: I love painting walls and fences.

Girl 2: I love memorizing tenses.

Girl 3: I love knitting dad a sweater.

Girl 4: I'm a champion pirouetter.

Boy 3: I add fractions in my head.

Boy 4: Come and watch me make my bed.

Professor Buonragazzo & Children: And they do it all so cutely, We can promise absolutely...

Satisfaction guaranteed, satisfaction guaranteed.

Have a child who will fulfill your every last parental need.

Boy 5: They say, build a better mousetrap.

Watch the customers stampede. (Watch the customers stampede.)(Watch the customers stampede.)(Watch the customers stampede.)

Don't be shy now.

If you buy now.

With the usual apparatus,

Just for you, we throw in gratis.

A set of steak knifes.

(?)Satisfaction guaranteed.