Doug: I start with a circle, and
Then draw a line
The line's the horizon, the circle's the sun
And maybe some squiggles,
To look like a hill
The hill we drove over,
The day I moved to Bluffington.
No way could I have imagined,
While doing time in our car's backseat (Spoken: Whoah!)
That the best place in all of the planet,
Was at 21 Jumbo Street
For starters, there's Skeeter
Skeeter (spoken): Yo, Doug! Honk-Honk!
Doug: He's my best pal
Skeeter (spoken): Uh, who're you talking to, man?
Doug: And then, of course, Patti
Patti (spoken): Hey, you guys!
Skeeter (spoken): Doug thinks she's cool!
Doug (spoken): Skeet!
Skeeter (spoken): Oh, sorry, man!
Roger: And don't forget Roger! (spoken: I'm RICH!)
Doug: He's sort of a pain.
All: And Chalky, And Beebe,
Roger (spoken): AND ROGER!
And all the kids at school
Roger (spoken): Those losers!
Doug: I guess it kind of surprised me
Skeeter, Patti, and Roger (spoken): Surprise!
Doug: With Patti, the guys, and Skeet,
That the best friends a kid could imagine,
All: Were at 21 Jumbo Street!
Doug: Did you ever wonder why stuff has to happen,
It happens to happen to who it happens to?
And then when it happens, Why it had to happen,
When it happens to happen to you?
Skeeter, Patti, and Roger (spoken): Huh?
Doug (spoken): Well, me too.
Skeeter (spoken): That's real neat, Doug.
Doug (spoken): I mean, how I happened to move to Bluffington. And well, how on my first day here, I just happened to meet the most incredible girl ever. Who's initials just happen to be: Patti Mayonnaise. I've been trying to get her to notce me forever! Oh, but to Patti, I'm just another dopey shoes, floppy shorts, green vest and white t-shirt wearing kind of guy, I guess. Oh, the crazy thing is, I keep hoping that she'll happen to say something like:
Patti (spoken): You know, Doug, one of the best things to happpen to us, is you!
Doug (spoken): Yeah?
Roger (spoken): Gah! I think I'm gonna puke!
Patti: You start with a new kid,
Figure he's nice
Roger: (spoken) Yeah, right!
(singing) The kind of a doofus,
You're itchin` to slug!
Patti (spoken): Come on, Roger.
Skeeter (spoken): Yeah, man!
Patti: There's days when he's crazy
And some where he's sweet.
Skeeter: But he's always your buddy,
Skeeter and Patti: When he's a guy a lot like Doug!
All: And though it sounds sort of sappy,
Roger (spoken): I'll say!
All: We'll hang out, and we'll all meet
`Cos the best friends a kid can imagine,
Are right here at your own two feet
And appear with the friends you meet
Doug: Here at 21 Jumbo Street.
- The part where Doug sings, "Did you ever wonder why stuff has to happen/It happens to happen to who it happens to" was his opening line in the Nickelodeon episode of the series, "Doug's Lucky Hat".
- When Patti sings, "There's days when he's crazy", the line is either sung or spoken, depending on the performance.