- “You know, gigantic troll, sharp teeth, nose like a broom handle, he grabs children puts them in a gaunter sack. You never heard of this?”
- ―Heinz Doofenshmirtz
"Der Kinderlumper" is a Season 4 episode of Phineas and Ferb.
The next day, Candace is dressed as the Rutabaga Princess, preparing for the 100th Annual Running of the Chinchillas. Stacy figures out that Candace wants to be Rutabaga Princess so she can be on TV, hopefully escalating her path to stardom, and making Stacy "famous by association."
Phineas calls out to Candace, having had Baljeet genetically alter rutabaga to make vehicles for her to ride in during the Running as he, Ferb, Buford, Baljeet, and Isabella demonstrate the vehicles, Candace declines and leaves with Stacy to start the Running. Meanwhile, Linda realizes she needs to be in Badgertown for the end of the Running, Perry enters his lair, where Major Monogram and Carl are handicapping the Running. Monogram tells Perry that Doofenshmirtz is planning to attend, and must be up to something. Perry leaves.
At the start of the Running, newsman Mike Van Hatofapilgrim reports while Candace initiates the event with the help of her Tuber Troubadour, Irving. The Running starts, and Candace and Stacy run alongside the chinchillas. Over at D. E. Inc., Perry arrives as Doofenshmirtz is putting the finishing touches on his Kinderlumper-inator. The scientist announces that he is planning to turn himself into a Kinderlumper, but Perry has never heard of the Kinderlumper. Doofenshmirtz explains the tale of the Kinderlumper by means of a song that his mother used to sing to him: the Kinderlumper is a giant, nasty troll who takes misbehaving children and puts them in a gundersack.
After telling the story, Doofenshmirtz enters his Kinderlumper costume, planning to turn himself into a Kinderlumper and scare his brother into giving up control of the Tri-State Area. He activates the -inator, but Perry starts fighting him, and they both get zapped, turning into Kinderlumpers. The -inator fires again, straight through the hole Perry used to get into the building.
While Candace and Stacy are still running, the ray hits the chinchillas behind them, turning them giant and troll-like. The two girls see this and take off. The chinchillas knock over the news van, and Mike tells his assistant to call in a news chopper. Back at D. E. Inc., Perry has destroyed the Kinderlumper-inator, along with everything else in the building. Doofenshmirtz lures him towards a giant X on the floor before dropping a cage on him, trapping him. He then leaves to scare his brother at the end of the Running.
At the Flynn-Fletcher house, the kids are preparing to cheer Candace on, when the two girls come running up to tell them about the giant chinchillas. They all get in the rutabaga vehicles to flee, as Mike continues to report from the chopper. However, the vehicles are not fast enough, and all the kids are gradually overcome by the wave of chinchillas. Candace and Stacy's vehicle crashes into a fire hydrant; Stacy is trapped and tells Candace to run as she too is stampeded. At the Running's finish line, Melanie tells Roger that the chinchillas should be there soon, but is frightened by the giant Kinderlumper (Doofenshmirtz) arriving. Roger, however, is excited. Doofenshmirtz is confused by his brother's lack of terror, but Roger tells him that their mother sang him a version presenting the Kinderlumper as a loving, gift-bringing creature.
The ray's effects wear off, turning Doofenshmirtz, Perry, and the chinchillas back to normal. Candace dramatically reaches the end of the Running, telling her parents to save themselves, before the now-normal chinchillas run over her. Lawrence asks Linda if she was this dramatic when she was Rutabaga Princess; she affirms. The kids and Stacy run up to Candace, congratulating her on her excellent Running as Rutabaga Princess. Candace asks how they weren't stampeded; Phineas reveals that they were, but the chinchillas were fluffy enough that no one was harmed. Mike comes up and reveals that they got it all on tape, including the kids and the rutabaga vehicles, pleasing Candace. However, the chinchillas climb in the helicopter (with the camera inside) and pilot it away, to Mike and Candace's chagrin. Phineas then sees Perry and greets him.
During the credits, a young Heinz is bouncing on his bed when his mother comes in to warn him: if he doesn't stop, he'll be visited by the Kinderlumper. Heinz goes to bed, but the Kinderlumper immediately appears in the window.
- Vincent Martella as Phineas
- Ashley Tisdale as Candace
- Thomas Sangster as Ferb
- Caroline Rhea as Mom
- Dan Povenmire as Dr. Doofenshmirtz, Additional voices
- Jeff "Swampy" Marsh as Major Monogram, Additional voices
- Tyler Alexander Mann as Carl
- Richard O'Brien as Dad
- Dee Bradley Baker as Perry, Additional voices
- Alyson Stoner as Isabella
- Bobby Gaylor as Buford
- Maulik Pancholy as Baljeet
- Kelly Hu as Stacy
- Jack McBrayer as Irving
- John O'Hurley as Roger
- Cloris Leachman as Doofenshirtz's Mom
- Pamela Adlon as Melanie, Additional voices
- Gordon Tokumatsu as Mike Van Hatofapilgrim
- "Kinderlumper" seems to be the match-up of two German words: "kinder" and "lumper", which means "children" and "stevedore".
- Gordon Tokumatsu, a local news reporter who was the inspiration for Gordon Gutsofanemu, voices Mike Van Hatofapilgrim.
- In Spain the final scene was deleted and the episode was paired with "Mind Share"
- This episode was aired on Disney Channel on Demand on February 8, 2013.
- This episode debuted on February 15 at 9:30 PM ET/PT instead of the usual 9 PM slot, as Gravity Falls returned after a 4-plus month dry spell with the episode "Boss Mabel".
- When broadcast alone, the credits play the unique video as explained above, but when broadcast with "Just Desserts" it uses the credits from said episode instead.
- This is currently the only episode in which it has a unique credit sequence, but is not the second segment.
- During the song Der Kinderlumper, he slithers similarly to how the Grinch in How the Grinch Stole Christmas does.
- The legend of a demonic beast that carries off naughty children and puts them in his sack comes from Krampus, St. Nicholas's assistant in early folklore.
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