(Restating my previous comment to begin a new thread coz the other one's getting long)
Interesting to see how you'd bring back Zola, since he was destroyed in The Winter Soldier. Not sure who'd play the Enchantress. (Isn't she DC though? She was the villain in Suicide Squad)
The thing is, I don't know a lot about Marvel characters that didn't appear in movies, and if they did, whoever played them in my first and/or favorite movie would be my first image of them. Like Gene Hackman is classic Lex Luthor, Jack Nicholson is my favorite Joker, etc. But I suppose if I saw pictures of them I could think of someone. You want that to get a clear image of them, right?
If nothing else, if they appeared in a previous movie, MCU or not, and you liked their portrayal, you can go for the image of that since it'll be your headcanon and all. Like how the James Bond reboot (Casino Royale, Quantum of Solace, Skyfall, and Spectre) used Judi Dench's M from the last four films in the original series (GoldenEye, Tomorrow Never Dies, The World Is Not Enough, and Die Another Day) even though they're a separate continuity.
Oh yes! In the comics, he puts his mind in a robot like here. So it is possible he transferred his mind to a robot like that before getting blown up imo. Indeed, but there is also a Marvel version. You can read more here, but she is from Asgard and could be interesting to add to The Masters of Evil. Since I reformed Hela, it will be good to still have some Asgard villains, I think.
I would also have Zemo wear his purple costume like he has in the comics like here , Hammer would become Titanium Man and his suit would like this, and Sterns would become Leader and look like this.
What do you think of my ideas so far on this?
Of course! That makes sense. I still think of Tobey Maguire as Spider-Man, so I see what you're saying.
Oh for sure! Good comparsion there. Do you like James Bond? I do. I thought Spectre was pretty good.
Reminds me of Dragonball Z, where the mad scientist Dr. Gero transplants his brain into an android body so he's one of the androids they have to fight.
Enchantress in animation has been voiced by Phosphora from Kid Icarus and Rainbow Dash from MLP? Both speedsters? Interesting. For who to visualize playing her in MCU, I almost want to say... Charlize Theron? (I'd have said Cate Blanchett or Michelle Pfeiffer first but they're both in MCU already)
Sounds interesting. We never did find out what the serum did to Sterns when it mutated him.
I like the original series, except On Her Majesty's Secret Service. The reboot series didn't have as much technology or elaborate deaths for the villains, and while I saw all of the other three movies, I never finished Quantum of Solace. Though I read how Dominic Greene died. Skyfall and Spectre weren't bad though.
I'm checking a list of actors I took note of for Doom, but I still keep thinking Julian McMahon like the original film. Maybe James Patrick Stuart, if you've seen him in anything. I can maybe think of another name but he might be too obscure.
Gary: Do you think Talos will let us have the day off on the 4th of July?
Phil: I dunno, Gary. The 4th of July is on a Thursday and I don't see any chance of Talos letting us have the day off work.
Talos: (Humming Avengers theme)
Gary: Oh, hey Talos.
Talos: Seriously? I just got back from my important meeting just to find you two idiots slacking off again?
Gary: Oh, sorry sir. We were just about to-
Phil: We were wondering if you will let us have the day off work on the 4th of July. Will you accept that?
Talos: Of course- NOT! The rulebook cleary says here on page 102039, "all Skrulls are to do their jobs during the weekday regardless if there's a special event or not." So unless the 4th of July is moved to the weekend then I'm not gonna let you off the hook.
Gary: But we really wanna spend the 4th of July relaxing and eating hot dogs.
Phil: Since when did we Skrulls eat hot dogs?
Gary: Hey don't look at me, Tile was the one who wrote this whole thing down.
Talos: Look you two, I'm afraid you're out of luck this year. But don't worry; there's always next year...
Gary: I guess you're right. If only there was a way to change the rules...
Talos: Well, I'm the only one who can do that since I lead the entire Skrull clan. But no. I'm keeping the rules the way they are.
Phil: Then our only choice is to shapeshift into Talos, steal the rulebook and change the rule so we are allowed to take the day off work when there's a special event occuring on that day.
Talos: What was that?
Talos: Yeah, I definetly heard what you just said... but there is no way you're getting your hands on the rulebook as I'm gonna lock it up in a safe which will be locked up in a BIGGER safe which will be locked up in AN EVEN BIGGER SAFE! So if you do break through the first layer, you'll still have to deal with the OTHER TWO.
Gary: Uh, Talos?
Gary: I don't mean to startle you but a giant spaceship just appeared next to our planet.
Talos: Oh, really? Why is it here!?
Gary: (Sees a building crumbling down) I have to say they're here to destroy our planet...
Talos & Phil: WHAT!?!?
(On the Kree ship)
Yon-Rogg: Alright Kree, we are about to blow up the planet, Skrullos using our massive laser cannons! We must make sure those Skrulls don't escape.
Kree 1: Uh sir, why are we even hurting the Skrulls anyway?
Yon-Rogg: Because it says on Disney Wiki that they are bad in most material and we're here to destroy them.
Kree 1: I guess that makes sense.
(Back on Skrullos, all the Skrulls board a gaint space cruiser)
Talos: Is everyone aboard!?
Gary: Wait for us!
Phil: Yeah, we have to bring all of our stuff; our valuables, photos of our relatives, my teddy bear-
Talos: JUST GET ON THE CRUISER BEFORE IT'S TOO LATE!
(All the Skrulls get on the massive cruiser and go into space)
Talos: Alright everyone, listen up! The Kree just declared WAR against us and this is just the beginning. There will be only ONE alien race standing after the war and that is gonna be US! I want all the Skrulls who have flight experience to go out there and battle the Kree.
Loki: I may not have experienced this in 1995 but I still have EXPERIENCE experience.
Talos: Shut up!
(The Skrulls enter their starships and the Kree head to theirs. 5 seconds later, it's a free-for-all)
Yon-Rogg: FIRE MORE KREE SHIPS!
Talos: FIRE MORE SKRULL SHIPS!
Yon-Rogg: ACTIVATE THE LASER CANNONS AND TARGET THEIR HOME PLANET!
(Suddenly, the planet, Skrullos, is no more)
Kree 1: What now, sir?
Yon-Rogg: Target the Skrull cruiser!
Talos: PUT UP THE CRUISERS SHEILD!
(The sheild comes up on the Skrull cruiser)
Yon-Rogg: SON OF A-
Kree 1: What do we do now?
Yon-Rogg: There are no sheilds on the Skrulls' support ships so DESTROY them.
(Blah blah blah, one big battle in space later... (I'm just recyciling this from The Last Jedi, lmao))
Yon-Rogg: That was the last of their support ships. It's just their main cruiser now...
Second in command Skrull: What do we do now, Talos? We're down to one ship!
Talos: We need to get out of range of the Kree ships! HIT THE HYPERDRIVE!
Cruiser driving Skrull: You had to make a stupid Star Wars reference!
(The Skrulls hit the hyperdrive in order to get a really long distance away from the Kree)
Kree 1: So can we have the rest of the day off now?
Yon-Rogg: Well since I didn't think of putting a tracking device on their ship- of course we can have the rest of the day off.
Rest of the Kree: HAHA, YES!
Meanwhile in another sector of the galaxy...
Gary: So now can we have the day off on the 4th of July?
Talos: Of course- NOT! We have to find a NEW planet we can live on.
Phil: As long as it has these two things: 1, oxegyn and 2, movies.
Gary: Why you care about movies these days anyway?
Phil: It's gonna be the first full-length feature to be CGI!
Gary: The first full-length film to be CGI? I thought it was gonna be "The VeggieTales Movie".
Talos: There's no such thing as a VeggieTales movie you idiots. Anyway, we need to get cracking at this planet searching thing. Hopefully we can find one and as long as none of us do anything stupid, the Kree won't find us.
Phil: How about this planet?
Talos: You found one? Well, what is it called?
Phil: Earth. It has oxegyn AND it also includes movies.
Talos: Then we have no time to lose! SET COURSE TO EARTH!
Skrull commander: Yes Talos.
The cruiseship approaches the planet Earth and when they get there, the Skrulls park the ship next to the planet.
Talos: Wow! What a primitive planet! I bet they still have cars that drive on the ROAD!
Gary: Wait, won't the people there start screaming if they see an alien race on their planet?
Talos: C'mon you guys, we have shapeshifting abilities! We can PERFECTLY blend in! But for now, I think it's time I went to sleep. We'll go down to the surface first thing in the morning... Goodnight everyone...
Phil: Goodnight, Talos.
Gary: Okay Phil, it's time we lived it up. We're gonna have a huge party while Talos is asleep and invite all our freinds!
Phil: Sure, I'll send the invotations online right now. (Presses a button to send invotations)
Gary: As long as we stop the party before Talos wakes up, we won't get destroyed... Wait, what button did you press?
Phil: I just pressed the button that said "send invotations to all"- wait, WHAT!?
Gary: You idiot! You just sent invotations to every being in the universe!
Gary: That means... YOU SENT THE INVOTATIONS TO THE KREE, TOO! Now they know where we are!!!
Talos: What are you two idiots doing disturbing my slumber???
Gary: Uh, Talos?
Talos: What is it?
Phil: We were planning to have a party and I accidentally sended the invotations to everyone in the galaxy...
Talos: Everyone... INCLUDING THE KREE!?!
Phil: Uhh... yes...?
Talos: Well, as long as you didn't put the location of where the party is being held in the invotation then-
Gary: He did.
(Just then, the giant Kree ship parks behind the Skrull cruiser)
Yon-Rogg: Found you! Looks like the little Hide n' seek game ends here!
Talos: YOU MORONS! NOW THE KREE KNOW EXACTLY WHERE WE ARE!
(On board the Kree ship)
Carol: Hey Yon-Rogg, I can't sleep, wanna fight me in the other room?
Yon-Rogg: Sure. Hey Craig, you're in charge.
Craig: Okay. EVERYONE, PREPARE TO BOARD THE SKRULL SHIP!
(No-one listens to Craig)
Craig: Why isn't anyone listening to me?
Kree 1: Sorry but we only listen to Yon-Rogg, lmao.
Carig: If only KREE had shapeshifting abilities then I could pretend to be Yon-Rogg.
Marvel: Sorry pal, but sometimes you cannot always get what you want.
(Suddenly, the Kree start to get tired and go to bed)
Craig: Hey, where ya all goin'?
Kree 1: We're going to sleep. We'll fight the Skrulls tommorrow...
Craig: Hey, listen! Yon-Rogg left me in charge, now get back here before-
(All the Kree leave making craig the only one in the room)
Craig: *sigh* I hate my life.
Talos: The Kree have gone to bed. Good.
Gary: But won't they start attacking us again in the morning.
Talos: I'll promise you that we'll wake up before they do and we'll go down to the surface and, since we can blend in easily, they will have no choice but to give up searching the place.
Phil: Yeah, our shapeshifting abilities shall help us stay a good distance away from the Kree. But what if a female with electric powers can see through our disguises and beats me up while pretending to be and old lady?
Talos: Ha! That'll never happen.
Gary: Are tickets to see "Toy Story" out yet?
DIRECTED BY TILE DENIAL STARRING:
PHIL THE SKRULL
GARY THE SKRULL
CRAIG THE KREE
ADDITIONAL SKRULLS AND KREE
And BRIE LARSON as CAPTAIN MARVEL
CAPTAIN MARVEL - ON BLU-RAY AND DVD JUNE 11 CAPTAIN MARVEL 2 - NOT CONFIRMED BUT IT MAY HAPPEN ANYWAY (Also, let's hope Marvel gets rid of the "haircut")
Okay, so we all know that Toy Story 4 is almost here, and if you have no idea what I'm talking about, then sit back, relax and listen here. I'm Tile Denial and I shall tell you everything you need to know before going to see Toy Story 4.
The first thing you need to know is that Toy Story is a franchise created by Pixar Animation Studios and is disturbed by the Walt Disney Company. The Toy Story films focus on Toys coming to life-
Person: Toys coming to life!? Why are you talking about Child's Play!?!
Me: Hey, this isn't Child's Play, it's Toy Story. There's a difference.
Person: Yeah right. To be honest, Chucky is really scary! And you seriously think it's okay to tell people about that horrifying horror film?
Me: Look, this is NOT Child's Play. Toy Story is different because there is no blood or bad language (Okay, I admit there was a lot of bad language in the first film)
Anyway, let's get back on track. The films focus on a group of toys who secretly come to life and have adventures whule their owner is away.
Person: Well, that's good, as long as the owner is a good distance away from the toys, he won't get stabbed by a knife.
Me: THIS IS NOT CHILD'S PLAY!
Sorry about that. Anyway, there has so far been 3 films in the Toy Story franchise but number 4 is set to release this summer on June 21st, 2019.
Person: See, you ARE talking about Child's play! Because the film releases on June 21st!
Me: CHILD'S PLAY AND TOY STORY 4 ARE DIFFERENT MOVIES YOU MORON!
Okay, so the first Toy Story film was released in 1995, which was also the year where the events of Captain Marvel take.
Person: What does that have even have to do with Toy Story?
Me: Sorry, i just wanted to keep TheOne1000 entertained.
Anyway, in the first film, Andy's favorite toy Woody was jealous when he got a Buzz Lightyear for his birthday party.
Person: So what did Woody do? Stab Andy in the abck with a knife because he abandoned his old favorite toy?
Me: THIS IS NOT CHILD'S PLAY!!!
It turned out that Buzz thought that he was an actual space ranger instead of a Toy so Woody tried throughout the film to tell him that he was just a child's play thing.
Person: So Buzz is just a thing in the movie "Child's Play"?
Me: ENOUGH! Let me continue!
Buzz Lightyear beleived he was a real space ranger but he evntually found out that he was a toy and became freinds with Woody. The sequel, Toy Story 2 was released only 4 years after the first film in 1999. The film brang back most of the characters from the first film as well as new one like Jessie, Bullsye, Mrs. Potato Head and Zurg though Mrs. Potato Head and Zurg were mentioned in the first film. The plot of the sequel was about Buzz and the gang trying to save Woody, after being stolen by a greedy toy collector named Al McWhiggin.
Person: So he collects toys? But what if he accidentally took Chucky home with him; then he'd get stabbed in the back with a knife.
Me: FOR CRYING OUT LOUD, WILL YOU JUST SHUT UP YOU IDIOT! CHUCKY HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH WHAT I'M SAYING! I'M TRYING TO TELL EVERYONE ALL THEY NEED TO KNOW BEFORE SEEING TOY STORY 4 AND I'M NOT GONNA PUT UP WITH YOU INTERRUPTING ME ANY LONGER!
Alright, so the second sequel, Toy Story 3 was released only 11 years later in June, 2010. The events of the third film take place a couple of years after the second film. It focuesd on the Toys trying to escape daycare after being donated and getting back to Andy's before he departs for college.
Person: Why would he wanna bring his toys with him to college? They could pick up a knife from the cafeteria and stab him in the back for donating them to a daycare.
Me: You just don't know when to stop, do you?
It turns out the toys didn't go with Andy to college. He decided to give his toys away to a girl named Bonnie who promised to take good care of them. And that's bascially how the third film ended. Toy STory 4 isn't long to wait for as the film will open in theaters this June.
Person: On the same day as Child's Play...
Me: I'm not finished! The fourth film will focus on the toys going on a road trip with their new owner and it'll also introduce new characters such as Gabby Gabby, Duke Caboom, Ducky, Bunny and Forky, a DIY toy made from a spork who is also Bonnies new favorite toy.
Person: Woody will wanna stab Bonnie with a knife for abandoning him and replacing him with a spork...
Btw, I'm making something called "everything you need to know before going to see Toy Story 4" and it's gonna have some references to Child's Play since 1: They both release on the same date and 2: Those movies both have toys coming to life. (I'm not a fan of scary stuff tho)
Note: If you have yet to see Endgame then stop reading because there’s some serious spoilers about it. But if you have seen Endgame; enjoy.
(A few months ago)
Disney: Alrighty all you Disney fans, the results are in. 20th century fox is finally part of the Disney family!
Disney: Alright 20th, put on the mouse ears!
20th: (Puts on mouse ears)
DC (In the crowd): We seriously need to start getting more companies on our side. ):
Warner Bros: Agreed.
Disney: Great to have you on our side 20th, we’re gonna have LOADS of adventures!
20th: So, does this mean every movie I’m releasing here is now gonna be disturbed by you?
20th: Sweet! I can’t wait to tell Other Marvel that.
Disney: Wait, there’s ANOTHER Marvel?
20th: Well it turns out the Other Marvel works for me. They were the ones who made the X-Men films, Deadpool, Wolverine and a bunch of others. And because of that, their films and their previous ones as well are now owned by you!
May 29, 2019
Disney: Marvel? You look dizzy. Something wrong?
Marvel: Yeah… I have a problem… I don’t think owning 20th is a good idea.
Disney: What are you talking about? It’s GREAT! That way they can make a bunch of films for us while we’re on vacation.
Marvel: Yeah, it’s just that… the truth is, me and Other Marvel have been rivals for a very long time. And that’s because of what happened years ago… you see, when Spider-man 3 came out in 2007, it was declared the worst. Then when we released Spider-man Homecoming, Other Marvel was SHOCKED to see how his collection of Spider-man fans got “robbed”. Then we got into a big fight over who was the better Spider-man and haven’t seen each other since. And since Other Marvel works for 20th, that means he’s now part of the Disney family too.
Disney: Oh, I see what you mean. Other Marvel was jealous of YOUR Spider-man movie.
Marvel: Indeed. He then got his revenge on me when Spider-man: Into the Spider-verse came along… Now, he’s gonna want to try and stop me from releasing Far From Home.
Disney: Yeah, Spidey’s a big money maker. Even films like Venom do.
Venom: Yeah, though my film is literal trash.
Disney: The point is, you and Other Marvel can’t keep up the war forever. Sometimes you gotta move on…
Marvel: You seriously had to make a stupid Endgame reference, didn’t you?
Disney: Yeah well, I can’t help you right now because I’m already trying to upload some TV spots for the Lion King.
20th: Hello, everyone. I am so glad that I have finally joined the Disney family.
Disney: Well, you’re in luck because the 30 seasons of “The Simpsons” are gonna be streaming on Disney+ in late 2019.
20th: Can we also put “Dark Phoenix” on it too?
Disney: I dunno. Let me think about it.
20th: Sweet! Guess I’ll see you all later.
(Later at the bar, 9:31)
20th: Alright you guys, so why are we having this meeting exactly?
Other Marvel: Well, Marvel Studios is planning something to end Phase 3 in which we cannot allow to happen.
20th: Really? Wasn’t Endgame a good ending to Phase 3?
Other Marvel: No, it is not! The real movie that’s ending Phase 3 is THIS! (Shows Spider-man Far From Home trailer thumbnail on YouTube to 20th)
Sony: Yep, they’re making a new Spider-man movie... but at least I’m helping them.
Other Marvel: You’re disturbing THIS one as well???
Sony: Well, I disturb ALL the Spider-man movies, DUH!
Other Marvel: URGH! I cannot believe that my trustworthy pal is disturbing films from MARVEL STUDIOS!
Sony: Well, if they didn’t make Homecoming or add him in the Civil War, then I wouldn’t be disturbing their films.
Other Marvel: It matters not. Anyway, it seems that the first movie wasn’t enough eh, Marvel? Well, we’ll just see about THAT! Spider-man Into the Spider-Verse was good enough. And I ain’t gonna let you steal away my audience a SECOND time…
20th: Well, what are you gonna do? It’s only like another month from here until it’s released. Besides, I don’t care who’s Spider-man is better?
Sony: I seriously believe that Tom Holland is the best Spider-man there is.
Other Marvel: NO, NOT TOM HOLLAND! Anthony Garfield is the best Spider-man!
Sony: Really? After what happened with the Amazing Spider-man 2, you think he’s the best Spider-man?
20th: It doesn’t matter! Because of how I’m part of the Disney category now, it makes Other Marvel part of it, too due to how I helped him with Deadpool and X-men. So that means all the previous Spider-man films now belong to Disney. (I think)
Sony: I’m starting to think that Deadpool being owned by Disney is a bad call. His films; they’re rated “R”.
20th: So, what? Every R-rated film that has been disturbed by Disney aren’t fully Disney films.
Sony: Oh, yeah. Disney films are either rated PG-13 or under. So, it’s more of a child friendly company.
Other Marvel: Yeah, but that doesn’t stop them from sneaking BLOOD into their films. I’ve already seen Endgame and Iron man’s face when he snaps his fingers with the Infinity Stones looks TOTALLY injured.
Sony: Indeed. But still, we have no idea how good FFH is gonna be. (Though I don’t like Iron Man being referenced dead in the trailer)
20th: You know what? I think all Spider-man films are the same…
Other Marvel: NO, THEY ARE NOT! After what happened with into the Spider-Verse, I will NOT let FFH be any BETTER!
June 1st, 2019…
Pixar: YES! Only 20 more days until the release of Toy Story 4!
20th: Yeah, well in 6 days, we’re releasing Dark Phoenix!
Pixar: Gee man, did I ASK?
Disney: (Enters the room)
20th: Oh, hey there Disney. Turns out that Other Marvel is trying to stop FFH from being released.
Disney: Well then, tell him to stop and if he doesn’t, tell him to go feel sick.
Other Marvel: Hello, Disney. How about we take it the easy way and you tell me where I can find Marvel Studios in this fine establishment?
Disney: Sorry, but he isn’t available right now. He’s busy putting together a Black Widow movie.
Pixar: Wait, isn’t she supposed to be dead?
Disney: IT’S A PREQUEL, YOU MORON!
Marvel: Who wants freshly baked croissants? I have a whole container full of the- (GASP!) YOU!
Other Marvel: YOU! So, the first movie wasn’t enough, eh?
Marvel: What movie? Iron Man? The Avengers?
Other Marvel: No! I’m talking about SPIDER-MAN! You’re trying to steal the Spider-Verse fans away from me! And I’m here to make sure that NEVER happens!
Marvel: Oh, c’mon! Just because now that you’ve joined the Disney category, you have to go ahead and rain on my parade?
Other Marvel: I don’t care if I’m now in Disney’s shoes. I’m gonna make sure that FFH never happens.
Marvel: Well then, looks like it’s up to me to stop you!
Other Marvel: Well if you do, I don’t see how people will like FFH. I saw that Endgame got capped down to 94% on Rotten tomatoes and I think it’s because people are upset due to Iron man’s death.
Marvel: You’re on!
Disney: (Eating popcorn)
20th: Could you all stop it, PLEASE? I don’t CARE which Spider-man is better, just MOVE ON!
Sony: You had to make an Endgame reference, didn’t you?
Other Marvel: Is that the best you can DO!?
Marvel: (Summons Ultron drones) THIS is the best I can do!
Other Marvel: Yeah, like a bunch of stringless puppets are gonna stop me. Hey, Deadpool! You know what to do!
Deadpool: With pleasure. Alrighty, how about we make it easy and you scream while I shoot you with my pistol.
Marvel: Like I wanna surrender. You don’t scare me.
Deadpool: I had a feeling you were gonna say that. (Fires pistol, but it shoots bubbles instead of bullets)
Thanos: You really think that would work?
Other Marvel: Okay then, time for a plan B… I’ll just use the Fantastic 4 against you.
Thanos: Yeah, well when I snap my fingers, half of the Fantastic 4 will still exist. Perfectly balanced as all things should be…
Marvel: Oh, shut up! Just get them!
Other Marvel: Aww, bad news, Marvel Studios. You just missed the bus to Losertown.
Marvel: Well that’s too bad. How’re you gonna get home now?
Other Marvel: Oh, I see what you did there!
20th: How long has this fight been going?
Disney: Who cares, it’s the first day of vacation. C’mon, let’s go down to the Ice-Cream store.
20th: Fair enough.
(The battle continues)
Other Marvel: Had enough yet?
Marvel: Well, I’ve gone this far, so I ain’t giving up.
Other Marvel: I really wish you didn’t get that button back from DC. Then, you wouldn’t have released Endgame. And if ENDGAME didn’t release then we wouldn’t have FFH!
Marvel: DC is a big jerk and so are you! You are no better! (Punches Other Marvel)
Other Marvel: (Punches Marvel back) YOU DESERVED THAT! YOUR SPIDER-MAN FILMS ARE DEAD! THE WAR IS OVER! AND WHEN I KILL YOU IT WOULD MEAN THAT ENDGAME WOULD BE THE LAST FILM YOU MADE!
Marvel: Wow… every word in that sentence you said… was wrong… my Spider-man films are reborn… the war is just beginning… and Endgame will not be the last film by me…
Other Marvel: I’ll kill you… and that way, you will never, EVER steal the audience away from me again…
Marvel: Yeah, well shoot me with that gun in your hand and I’ll always be with you…
Other Marvel: That cannot be true. When I kill you, you’ll be gone, gone for eternity!
Marvel: No… no-one’s ever really gone…
Palpatine: (Evil laughter)
Other marvel: (Steps towards Marvel and shoots him)
Thanos: Wow, you are not smart.
Other Marvel: (Realizes that the gun is emitting bubbles) ARE YOU SERIOUS!? YOU AND YOUR STUPID BUBBLES!
Marvel: (Kicks Other Marvel)
Other Marvel: OKAY, OKAY! I surrender…
Marvel: That’s what I thought you’d say…
Disney: We’re back, who wants Ice-Cre- (GASP!) WHAT IS THE MEANING OF ALL THIS MESS!?
Marvel: Well, you see-
Disney: Here! (Tosses broom to Marvel) Get to work! And if that ain’t done by tomorrow afternoon, then you know what’s coming…
20th: So, what should we do now?
Disney: How about you go help me make some more TV spots for The Lion King in which we’ll release in July?
20th: I guess it wouldn’t hurt…
Disney: See? There you go, happy ending for all of us.
A funny short story that takes place after the Last Jedi and before the Rise of Skywalker.
(Shortly after the resistance escaped the Planet Crait)
Snowtrooper 1: Found anything?
Snowtrooper 2: No, but we might as well keep searching…
Officer: Sir, we’ve covered this whole base and there’s no rebel in sight.
Snowtrooper 1: But where could they’ve possibly gone? This is the only way in or out of the base.
Kylo Ren: They’ve escaped…
Kylo Ren: Saw the girl through the force… she was escaping alongside everyone else…
Hux: So, you mean to say that the ghost of Skywalker was stalling so they could escape!? HOW COULD YOU NOT REALIZE THA-
Kylo Ren: (Force pushes Hux, smack into the wall) They may have gone… but we will hunt the down no matter how long it takes…
(Later on a Star Destroyer)
Hux: We have lost a lot of lives in the past few hours… Phasma… Snoke… they’re gone. I want you to learn a lesson from this, Ren… if you refuse to obey my commands… you know what’s coming.
Kylo Ren: Yes Hux… indeed…
Kylo Ren: (Repairing helmet)
Stormtrooper 1: Hey, Kylo Ren?
Kylo Ren: What is it, Stormtrooper?
Stormtrooper 1: Hux wants you available at 3:00pm so he can discuss with you and the other staff if we should make a second Starkiller Base.
Kylo Ren: Urgh! Just tell them to go for it! Like I have any other options these days…
Stormtrooper 1: Oh, okay… say, what are you even doing in there?
Kylo Ren: What does it look like I’m doing? I’m repairing my helmet because I’m sick of people not recognizing me as “Kylo Ren”. Their excuse; they notice me more “when I’m wearing the helmet”.
Stormtrooper 1: Yeah… and another thing, your shuttle is blocking the TIE fighter exit so I suggest you move it before things get ugly.
Kylo Ren: Okay, just wait until I finish repairing my helmet. (Continues repairing his helmet but it breaks into pieces) Are you KIDDING ME? SON OF A-
Speaker announcer: Would Kylo Ren please report to the TIE fighter hanger? Your shuttle is being towed.
Stormtrooper 1: Yeah, I figure you should get it before things get ugly.
Kylo Ren: I’m already trying to fix my helmet, I seriously can’t do two things at once. If only I could…
Dr. Strange: Well, I can make that happen.
Stormtrooper 1: (Points gun at Dr. Strange) Get out!
Kylo Ren: Can you all PLEASE get out of my sight. I need all my concentration to make this pile of rubble into a newly constructed helmet.
Stormtrooper 1: Just use the force for goodness sake.
Kylo Ren: Hey, you’re on to something. Why didn’t I think about doing that earlier? (Uses force to rebuild helmet) Haha, yes! (Helmet breaks as the parts aren’t stuck together) Oh, C’MON ALREADY!
(Hux enters the room)
Hux: Kylo, your ship is being towed. I suggest you should-
Kylo Ren: (Force-chokes Hux and pushes him in his rage)
Stormtrooper 1: Uh, I don’t want any trouble, buddy.
Kylo Ren: Well maybe if all of you weren’t here wasting my time then you wouldn’t even be in any trouble right at the moment.
Stormtrooper 1: I suppose not…
Kylo Ren: Look kid. Why don’t you go and secure the area. There could be rebels sneaking on our ship for all I know…
Stormtrooper 1: I guess it wouldn’t hurt.
Kylo Ren: See, there you go, now I can finally go back to doing what I was doing.
Stormtrooper 2: But sir, what about your shuttle?
Kylo Ren: It matters not, just tell them to build a new one. But make it bigger, because that’ll help us somehow. Also, make me a coffee while you’re at it.
Hux: Look, I know that me talking to you during your hard times can be annoying, but did you really had to go ahead and beat me up?
Kylo Ren: I’m a Sith, so there’s nothing wrong about it. Now will you excuse me, I have some important helmet constructing to do.
Hux: How exactly are you gonna re-build your helmet from just a few pieces?
Kylo Ren: I have everything I need, thank you very much. Now please leave, I wanna be left alone.
Officer: Uh, Hux?
Hux: Yes, officer Billy?
Officer: I’m afraid your ship was destroyed by a wing that fell off a TIE fighter.
Hux: Not a good time. There’s no WAY my insurance company is gonna cover for this.
Kylo Ren: Can you two please leave me alone. I’m trying to fix my helmet and I cannot do it with you two idiots standing there.
Hux: Well, maybe Snoke is right about you just being a child in a mask.
Kylo Ren: Say that again, and I will slice you into a million pieces with this because it’s the coolest lightsaber that ever existed.
Stormtrooper 1: What about Mace Windu’s?
Kylo Ren: (Slices Stormtrooper’s legs off with lightsaber)
Stormtrooper 1: It’s okay, Darth Maul survived this, I can too.
Stormtrooper 3: Hey Kylo Ren, I need to ask you something.
Kylo Ren: URGH! WHAT!?
Stormtrooper 3: I accidentally mistaken your helmet for a piece of trash that needed throwing out and I kinda tossed it in the disintegrator.
Kylo Ren: ALRIGHT, THAT’S IT! You have all wasted my time! I try to do ONE SIMPLE THING and you all have to come along and ruin it for me. I’m officially DONE with you people. Now please, just leave me alone so I can-
Stormtrooper 3: Uh, sir?
Kylo Ren: WHAT NOW!?
Stormtrooper 3: I was just wondering; wanna hear a joke?
Kylo Ren: I’VE HAD ENOUGH WITH YOU JOKERS ALREADY! NOW I’M GONNA KILL ALL OF YOU, SO SAY GOODBYE TO THE GALAXY! (Turns on lightsaber)
Stormtrooper 2: Wow, this is awkward; if only your father could see what you have become.
Kylo Ren: Well, my father is dead. I killed him.
Stormtrooper 2: No; I am your father.
Kylo Ren: No… that’s not true… THAT’S IMPOSSIBLE!
Stormtrooper 2: (Removes helmet revealing that he’s Han Solo)
Everyone else: GASP!
Han Solo: Guess none of you saw THAT coming?
Spider-man: Actually, I saw that coming. You know, Spider-sense and all that.
Han Solo: Way to kill the moment, DUDE!
Kylo Ren: No… this cannot be true!
Han Solo: Well, it is. That guy you killed back in 2015 was a Skrull. Their shapeshifting abilities have come so far.
Talos: Are abilities sure have.
Kylo Ren: Oh, you got to be serious. Fooled by a Skrull.
Talos: Oh, yes indeed. The girl, FN-2187, the X-Wing Pilot, the robot ball; they are all Skrulls in disguise.
Kylo Ren: So, you’re saying that REY is a SKRULL? But that means… YOU’RE A SKRULL!
Han Solo: No, I’m not, I really AM your father.
Kylo Ren: DIE, PHONY! (Kills Han Solo for real this time)
Talos: You killed Han Solo… Hey Carol! Beat this guy up.
Carol: With pleasure.
Kylo Ren: Stand back, Skrull! I have a laser sword and I’m not afraid to use it!
Carol: Seriously? You think that I, Captain marvel, is a Skrull?
Hux: So, you assume you aren’t, eh? Well, prove it!
Carol: (Energy blasts Hux)
Hux: Like that was supposed to prove anything.
Carol: A Skrull cannot do that.
Hux: You expect me to believe your words, don’t you?
Kylo Ren: There! It’s finished! (Helmet breaks into pieces again) OH, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD SAKE! GRANDFATHER, HELP ME!
Sometimes, Kylo Ren should just relax and take it slow n’ steady.
"Star-Lord is dead! He's gone! But he's right there on my back, and here in my heart, he lives on as a part of me! If you're gonna dig, dig to the heavens. No matter what's in my way I won't stop! Once I've dug through, it means that I've WON! Just who the hell do you think I am?!?!?! I'm Leyenar. I'm not Star-Lord. I'm ME! Leyenar The Avenger!"
Sorry for not really being active today. Starting tomorrow I will be gone for almost 2 weeks and will have little to no internet connection during this time. I’ll try to respond when I can, but until then, see ya in a couple of weeks!
Made this a while back but I forgot all about it. I decided to show you it so I don't get lazy later on.
The year was 2017 when Marvel released their first look at the film for the Black Panther, as seen from Captain America: Civil War. Marvel has been working real hard to make it the best Marvel film in history. As their 10th anniversary comes along in 2018, the MCU has big plans... but that’s another story…
January 31st, 2018
DC: Ah, January is finally over and there is only 11 months until we release our new film, “Aquaman.” And I have a feeling it’s gonna be a HIT on Rotten tomatoes.
Warner Bros: You said that LAST year. And the year before. And the year before.
DC: SO, WHAT!? THIS year I’m sure the critics are gonna love us for once. But if they DON’T, then we still have Shazam! and that Joker movie they should look forward to… because if Marvel gets another good film this year and we get bad ratings on Aquaman, we are DEFINETLY gonna turn them down with our movies for 2019.
Warner Bros: Yeah, except Marvel is planning on releasing something BIG this April.
DC: I’m not talking about the 19th Marvel film, I’m talking about the 18th: the origin story of the Black Panther. (Or at least I think it is)
Warner Bros: I dunno, DC. By the looks of it Black Panther is gonna be a HIT!
DC: That’s what MARVEL wants you to think. When Thor: Ragnarok came out, I was not really interested in all the “coarse language” and I bet Cap didn’t like it either.
Warner Bros: Whatever. We should DO something about this.
DC: You’re right.
Then he got an idea. An awful idea. The Grinch (I mean DC) had a wonderful awful idea…
DC: I know EXACTLY WHAT TO DO! Erase all the footage of Black Panther then when everyone goes to cinemas, the film will be over in JUST FIFTY SECONDS!!! HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAH!!!
February 14th, 2019
Warner Bros: Why did we decide to do this on VALENTINES DAY!?
DC: Because the film releases on the 16th so we must try and erase the footage.
(Breaks into Marvel HQ)
DC: Now we just need to find the camera that holds all the Black Panther footage. Then we press the “delete” button. Then, not only will Black Panther not release but it will ALSO make Marvel and the crew start making the movie over from SCRATCH! And then, when they DO finish, we’ll delete-
Warner Bros: Yes, I get it, we do the same thing over and over again, okay, fine.
DC: Good. Now let’s get that camera. The good news is that all the guys are out today looking for Valentines of their own that nobody’s guarding the footage.
(Meanwhile, outside Marvel HQ)
Tony Stark: Happy Valentine’s Day, Pepper.
Pepper: Thank you Tony. (Kisses Stark on the side)
Tony Stark: How’s the baby doing?
DC: See what I mean? If Stank is distracted, so is everyone ELSE.
Warner Bros: Whatever. I’ve found it anyway.
DC: HAHA, YES!!! Now, we just need to delete the footage…
Camera voice: Are you sure you would like to delete the footage for Black Panther?
Camera voice: Haha, tricked you. Now deleting all footage from Aquaman.
Warner Bros: Oh, guess I picked up OUR movie camera by mistake.
Tony Stark: WHAT’S GOING ON IN HERE!
DC: (Gasp!) RUN!!!
Tony Stark: (Uses nanotech to activate iron suit) You’re not going anywhere.
Warner Bros: (Looks at a huge poster for Avengers 3) Huh? What’s this? An Avenge-
DC: WE DON’T HAVE TIME FOR THIS!!! RUN YOU MANIAC!!!
Warner Bros: OKAY OKAY!!!
Captain America: (Uses his shield to block exit)
Bruce: HAHAHHAHAHAHHAHHAHAHA! YOU GUYS ARE SO SCREWED NOW!
Marvel: Nice try boys. But there’s no deleting footage today. (Gives DC & WB the boot)
February 16th, 2018
DC: Okay, WB, I have a new plan: All we have to do is go to the cinema and see how good the Black Panther film IS.
Warner Bros: But it got 90 something percentage so we already KNOW that it’s good.
DC: That’s just what the CRITICS think. We might as well see for ourselves.
(Which is exactly what they did)
DC: That was actually satisfying… Oh, well. At least we don’t expect any blockbusters anytime soon…
Warner Bros: Actually… there’s a new Avengers movie coming out in April.
And man, MCU back in 2018. When Infinity War was a blast and Captain Marvel was thought to have some big role in Endgame (then called Avengers 4 with no thought of all of the “haircut”) and we were having other great films like Black Panther and Ant-Man and the Wasp! Almost wish I could time travel like Dr. Strange and go back to last year. LOL!
Skrull: It's Captain Marvel. It's getting released on DVD, June 11.
Talos: You do realise that Carol is a person, not a thing.
Skrull: I'm talking about the movie, not the character, stupid.
Talos: Oh, sorry about that. We might as well see how we turn out in the trailer.
(One trailer later)
Talos: Well, that wasn't really surprising.
Skrull: I know, right. It didn't have a whole lot of Skrulls in it.
Talos: No, I meant how they covered up spoilers by using footage from Iron Man, The First Avenger and Thor. People should pretty much know that we're the good guys so why did Marvel even cover that fact up?
Marvel: Well you see, some people who would've wanted to watch the film were too late because it was no longer in cinemas. That's why we had to cover up the thing with you being good guys so we don't spoil it for them.
Talos: Well it's there fault they didn't go see in theatres in the FIRST place.
Skrull: Or maybe if Marvel never MADE Captain Marvel then we wouldn't have to worry about it.
Talos: It doesn't really matter. Not much people liked the film anyway.
Marvel: I know. Probably because they like DC's better.
DC: Yeah, well you might've lost there but with your stupid Endgame, you stole the audience back. Now all I need is for Joker to get a bad rating and it'll be back to the dull years for me.
Skrull: You know, while we're on the topic of films... WHAT DID YOU DO MARVEL!?
Marvel: What do you mean?
Skrull: You literally make an origin story for Captain Marvel because everyone thought she'd play a HUGE role in Endgame but it turns out that the film DID'NT have a whole lot of Carol in it. Besides, you gave her a haircut to make it 100 times WORSE!
DC: You know, I bet that's the reason why Endgame got a good rating. Most of the population on Earth hated Carol's film so the only reason why people liked Endgame MORE is because of how Captain Marvel didn't play a HUGE role in it. (Not saying it's the actual reason but I'm 25% sure it is)
Marvel: It's not MY fault. I just wanted to make her look like she does in the cartoons.
Skrull: So that's your excuse. Well then, you leave me and Talos no choice.
Talos: Yeah, he's right. We're going to shapeshift into DC and haunt you until you apologise for what you did to Carol in Endgame.
DC: That's actually a good idea. You guys can cover for me while I'm on summer vacation.
Talos: Actually, that's not what I meant...
Captain America: It doesn't matter anyways. Carol will never be as cool as us.
Marvel: Yeah, well which do you prefer? 1995 version or 2023 version?
Talos: I'm gonna have to say 1995 because one; Carol sucks in 2023 and two; 2023 is only 4 years away so why didn't you wait until THEN to release Endgame?
Marvel: Then people will be all like "What's taking so long for Avengers 4 to show up?" and I'm gonna get totally MOBBED!
Skrull: Well, your fault you added the 5 years later thing.
Marvel: Guess so. But it doesn't matter. As long as Endgame still remains at 95% on Rotten Tomatoes then we're safe. (And DC's doomed)
Fans who hated Endgame: Why did you kill Iron Man and Black Widow? Why did Captain Marvel get a haircut and a lousy role in the film? And WHY did you add that stupid 5 years later thing when they could've done all THAT back in 2018???
Marvel: Uhh... Oh, would you look at that. I have to go and make a trailer for the new Black Widow film coming out in 2020 or so. Gotta sprint. (Runs away)
Skrull: Isn't Black Widow dead?
Talos: IT'S A DAMM PREQUEL YOU MORON!
Later in mid-June...
Person 1: Wanna go and get CM on DVD?
Person 2: Nah, I'll just wait until it's on Netflix.
Person 1: I don't see any chance of that happening. They're putting Disney content on a streaming device of their OWN called Disney+.
You could. Just change a few things and there ya go! :p
Also, in the CM DVD trailer: We need heroes: shows Iron Man (dead), Captain America (old man), Thor (fat drunk hobo), then says we need you: shows Captain Marvel like she’s a big deal but Endgame gives her like 3 minutes of screen time and a “haircut”....LOL
So I got back home today and I was wondering if you do anymore Endgame parodies to me, could you please fix the Hulk who now acts like a celebrity and make him go back to being Bruce Banner again? Thanks!
Right. Actually I think Sony made Spidey 3, but I'll check.
And that's a good choice. He's my second favorite, but Tobey Maguire is the Spider-Man I grew up with so he's my favorite, and I really hate Sony for cancelling Spider-Man 4 and making those awful Andrew Garfield Amazing Spider-Man movies.
Yeah! It looks like Disney got their audience back after hating Endgame.
Anyway, you were right about not having the same thoughts as RT. Because though Endgame is a good one, some people like you don't agree with that. Captain Marvel may not have a good audience score but as long as people like you agree that it's good, then you might as well have no choice but to go higher, further, faster!
They got be back for sure! Great live action remake!
Lol exactly! That's a good waying at looking at it tbh. Believe, I really wanted to like Endgame, but I obviouslly didn't. And can you blame as huge CM fan when they give her like no role and some "haircut". CM 1995>>>>>>>>>CM 2023 :p And killing Tony and Nat and so on.