"Mortimer Mouse" is a song from the animated series Disney's House of Mouse. In the episode "Ladies' Night", Mortimer Mouse was initially scheduled to perform this song while Mickey, Donald and Goofy were away, but Minnie (with the help of Hyacinth Hippo) kicked him out for flirting with Clarabelle. When Minnie realized they had to make up for the time slot Mortimer's song would have taken, she, Clarabelle, and Daisy performed the song instead; after an initially chilly reception due to the lyrics being self-aggrandizing, Minnie, Daisy and Clarabelle altered the lyrics to poke fun at Mortimer for his various character flaws, winning the audience over again.
Lines 1-10 of the song praise Mortimer, while lines 14 and on are ad-libs by the girls insulting him. Lines 11-13 are a spoken interlude.
Lyrics[]
Mike: And now put your hands together for Minnie, Daisy and Clarabelle.
Minnie: Who's the guy that you and I just love to adore?
Daisy: Who's got looks and brains and brawn and talent galore?
Clarabelle: And every time he takes a bow, they're screaming for more?
All: Mortimer, Mortimer, Mortimer Mouse!
Daisy: Oh, brother, who wrote these lyrics?
Clarabelle: I'll give ya three guesses!
Minnie: Who is smart, successful, brilliant, handsome, and tall?
Daisy: Style, grace, gorgeous face, who has it all?
Clarabelle: Who's a blend of John and George and Ringo and Paul?
All: Mortimer, Mortimer, Mortimer Mouse!
(audience booing)
Minnie: Uh oh, this isn't working.
Daisy: We'll handle this!
Minnie: He can play Othello, Hamlet, Lear and Macbeth!
His talent knocked the critics dead!
Daisy: So did his breath.
Clarabelle: And what a face, why Frankenstein got scared half to death
All: When he saw Mortimer, Mortimer, Mortimer Mouse!
(audience applauding)
Daisy: It's working!
Minnie: Uh huh!
Minnie: I wanna see him on a stage!
Daisy: There's one leaving at noon.
Minnie: His popularity's huge!
Clarabelle: Unlike his IQ.
Minnie: He never lies, cheats or steals.
Daisy: Unless nobody knows.
Minnie: His talent has no end!
Clarabelle: Just like his nose!
Minnie: Oh, who's the best above the rest, a genius and whiz?
Daisy: Who's got the clout, without a doubt's the best in the biz?
Minnie and Clarabelle: Who's the guy who's perfect 'cause he says that he is?
All: Mortimer, Mortimer Mouse!
Let's give him a hand, a tip of the hat!
Let's give him a cheer, a hearty congrat!
Clarabelle: Is he a mouse or just a big, giant rat?
All: He's Mortimer Mouse!
Minnie: He brings down the house!
Clarabelle: Who cares that he's obnoxious, and a jerk and a louse?
All: He's Mortimer, Mortimer, Mortimer, Mortimer Mouse!
Daisy: We're speaking of the man he loves.
Trivia[]
- When Clarabelle says that Mortimer is a blend of John, Paul, George, and Ringo, she's talking about the popular '60s band The Beatles.
- When Daisy sings about Mortimer's clout, his star has his first name misspelled. It's spelled as "Mortiner".
- Near the end of the song, Clarabelle once jokingly asked if Mortimer was "a mouse or just a big giant rat", despite him obviously being a mouse. This is referring to Mortimer's sleazy behavior as rat can be used as a slang for an unpleasant and deceitful individual.
