Mrs. Marlene Driscoll is the weird and awkward Science and Home Economics teacher at Norrisville High.
Mrs. Driscoll is known for carrying the bones of her late husband around, and making him talk by moving its mouth and speaking, which greatly disturbs her students and creeps them out. She's ditzy and bizarre, having students grow strange plants or taking them to a cactus maze. But she doesn't seem to care about grades and help to fail students raise them which may suggest that she's a bad teacher. She labels her students as either numbskulls or good. She enjoys dangerous things, and she fell in love and married Jerry, a mad scientist. But she does have some compassion, cringing when she heard Randy hollering in the cactus maze, although only walking away after awhile. She also is extremely affectionate towards Mr. Driscoll, often using him to tease her and make romantic comments, which again creeps the students out.
Marlene Driscoll has somewhat long curly gray hair and a wrinkled face with lots of lipstick on it. She has blue eyes and very long eyelashes, and she builds is tall and skinny. She wears a blue shirt and dark blue skirt under a long white lab coat with light blue sleeves and pockets. On her feet, she has dark blue socks and brown and white shoes.
Jerry Driscoll was her evil husband. After Jerry's death, Mrs. Driscoll kept his skeleton with her in her class and pretends to make him talk regularly. Their relationship was somewhat explored in "Dawn of the Driscoll". She also noted that him turning into a skeleton was a "funny story." She states that she likes dangerous men when Randy asks why she married him. When he is brought back to life, she is able to talk him out of destroying the world and kisses him a lot. But once he starts making plans to destroy the universe afterward, she wearily agrees for the Ninja to reverse the Art of Healing. Back at her classroom, though, she still dances with him as nothing has changed.
In "Nukid on the Block", she explains that Mr. Driscoll is teaching Home Education to help save up for cruise (and she tells the students not to let him know that she knows because it is supposed to be a surprise).
Mrs. Driscoll sees Randy as a failing student and a "numbskull". She tells Randy and Howard that they're failing, although she never helps them improve it. She doesn't like listening to Randy's wailing in pain during the field trip to the cactus maze in "Sword Quest" and she awkwardly walks away.
On the other hand, she likes the Ninja, having no issues explaining the situation to him in "Dawn of the Driscoll".
He is the one who revealed Jerry's plan of destroying the planet which most likely caused the mad scientist to be arrested. He is acquainted with Marlene and they remember each other. It is uncertain if she holds a grudge against him for betraying her husband but they do work together with the Ninja to stop Jerry from using his Doomsday Device in "Dawn of the Driscoll".
- From the way she paired up students in "Monster Dump", she considers either Julian or Stevens to be a bad student.
- She keeps her husband's skeleton in her classroom, and interacts with it as if he were alive, sometimes in very inappropriate ways.
- She's attracted to dangerous men.
- She's still carries her husband's skeleton everyday.
- She had red hair when she was younger.
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