Temper, Temper was a song from the musical adaptation of Mary Poppins that featured the nanny sending Jane and Michael to their room and bringing the toys to life. The toys then put the two misbehaving children on trial for the most wanton crime of losing their tempers! The song was infamous for scaring the younger audience members and was later replaced with "Playing the Game", a much tamer version of the lesson, focusing more on treating the toys with kindness, that featured Mary on stage as the ringleader yet also a buffer to the craziness as well.
Lyrics[]
Jane
What's Happening, I Don't Understand?
Valentine
I'm sure you don't Jane,
You and Michael think you have nothing to learn,
But you don't understand the simplest of things!
Michael
Why are you all so big?
Valentine
Ha-ha-ha-ha
You'll find out,
Children who lose their temper,
Will lose everything else in the end!
Mwa-Ha-Ha-Ha
Valentine and Other Toys
(chanting) Temper, Temper, Temper, Temper,
Temper, Temper, Temper, Temper,
Temper-Temper-Temper-TEMPER!!!
Valentine
(sung) Temper, Temper!
Caught you at last,
Your quick, Temper,
Went a bit fast!
Valentine and Other Toys
This is a place of Woe
(a place of woe)
This is a place
Where All Wicked Children Go!
Jane
(spoken) But this our Nursery!
Valentine
Not anymore, this is our Nursery!
Toys
(sung) Temper, Temper,
That was your crime,
We've been watching,
You for some time,
We knew that you'd appear,
(That you'd appear)
We knew your,
Temper Tantrums would lead you here!
Michael
(spoken) Stop! Leave us alone!
Bailiff 1
Pray silence for the judge!
Michael
What judge?!?
Bailiff 2
All Rise!
Judge
(sung) Temper, Temper,
Silence, in court,
Is this not the story
You thought!
You have to stand on trial,
(Stand on trial)
You will not see your parents,
for quite some while!
Judge and Bailiffs
Children who refuse to learn,
Will not return,
All
Children who refuse to learn,
Will-Not-Return!
Judge
(spoken) Are you Jane and Michael Banks?
Jane
Yes, and we live at 17 Cherry Tree Lane!
Bailiff
Not anymore you don't,
You're at destiny's crossroad!
Toys
Call the first witness!
Call the first witness!
Call the first witness!
Rag Doll
(sung) Temper, Temper,
Think of the cost,
Of a Temper,
Once it's been lost,
Rag Doll & Toys
You cannot get it back,
(Get it back)
It's no excuse to say,
That you're mood was black!
Toys
(spoken) Call the surprise witness!
Call the surprise witness!
Call the surprise witness!
Jack-in-the-Box
Surprise!
I saw them you're honor,
They were fighting over Valentine!
Judge
Go on!
Jack-in-the-Box
And toys,
Oh no,
And games!
Toys
(sung) Children who refuse to learn will not return!
Children who refuse to learn,
Will-Not-Return!
TEMPER-TEMPER!
Judge
What is your verdict?
Toys
GUILTY!!!
Judge
You stand there cold as brass,
You face the stiffest sentence,
This court can pass!
Toys
Children who refuse to learn,
(Children who refuse to learn)
Children who refuse to learn,
Will-Not-Return!
Mary Poppins
(swinging the doors open to the nursery, causing everything to cease and desist) Temper-Temper!